March 28th- Dwell and shine...
Was having a tough day. Couldn’t get focused, find my grounding. Battled with self-pity, doubt, purpose. The voice in my heart – “go to church”.
So, I listened. The church was dark, peaceful and quiet (except when the janitor decided to vacuum the alter, ha). I sat there looking around, taking in the crucifix, Mary, Joseph, the stations. I asked, “I am here, what do you want to say”. I thought about and felt, presence and safety. But a completeness did not come.
Asked to speak with Father or the Deacon. Father was not in, the Deacon available. My request to him was to pray. He inquired what was going on. I jumped all over in my story, my feelings. He offered good reminders, forgiveness is letting go, it’s ok to have certain emotions. We conversed about wanting vs receiving what we need. We prayed. Then, he asked if I wanted communion. YES! This was the calling, to receive the body and have it dwell and shine within me.
The heart speaks softly, follow and be amazed.
Hmmm, living sign in your heart…day 237!
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